People who know that I am in a relationship again have been asking me why I haven’t changed my status in friendster. Yes, friendster is the BIG announcer of your current status in your lovelife. It’s not that I want to hide my relationship from the world. I just want to keep things simple for now. I’ve already experienced being open and public with everyone and though I feel like they were happy for me then (well, most were happy but I’ve heard just recently that some did not approve of it at the start), I didn’t like what transpired when the relationship ended. People tend to make up stories and form their opinion based on that. They think like they know everything about your relationship just because you shared to them some teeny-weeny bit of your story.
I still remember how hard it was to cope back then…how people have this tendency to open healing wounds when they start to ask…how I just shrugged off each bad opinion about the relationship…and how it was hard explaining to them that it just didn’t work. If I tell everybody now, surely there will be lots of opinions again. I even have this friend here in the office who had her boyfriend misjudged by people in her department because of her boyfriend’s occupation. They think that her boyfriend will start to play around because of his line of profession. Crap. Just because their marriage didn’t work because their husband was in the same field would mean that it’d have the same ending. It’s a different person for crying out loud!
Not announcing actually makes this relationship all the more special. I have this tendency to get approval from others and then stick with my decision when I hear positive feedback. It’s different this time. I am happy without consulting anybody. I made this decision because my heart says so, not because others approved of him or because other people think he’s a great catch.
If I can shout to the whole world that I love him, I will. But I’m contented with the way things are going right now. That we are both happy. I am happy. I have loved. I am loved.